Day 3: Humility?

Yesterday I faced my strongest challenge yet; Arby’s Beef, Bacon N’ Cheddar! Alone, each element represents a staunch foe; Arby’s – with it’s tangy / sweet sauce and onion topped buns; Cheddar cheese – melted and oozing from the sides of a sandwich; Beef – sliced so thin that it not so much melts in your mouth, but makes love to your taste buds; and Bacon – bacon is so good, it has toppled empires (an argument over the last slice of bacon ultimately caused the fall of the Romans). Staring down a sandwich that combined all of these elements, I felt like Batman facing down an entire rogue’s galley (Poison Ivy, Two-Face, Penguin. . . AND the Joker – holy super villain team up!), and all I had in my utility belt was a wimpy side salad with a raspberry vinaigrette dressing. Ultimately I escaped with my vegan status intact, but it was a costly victory as my morale sank to a new low. Fortunately for me, I had an apple waiting for me back at my desk…sigh.

While lunch was the low point thus far, dinner was easily the peak. After staying late at work, I decided that I didn’t really feel like cooking dinner for myself – so I placed a call to the wonderful people at Sunflower Vegetarian Restaurant (now with TWO locations). I still have no idea what they do to their tofu, but their “General Tso’s Surprise” has a more ‘meat like’ consistency than 75% of the Chinese food restaurants out there. Since I was so let down by my lunch, I also picked up an order of veggie lo mein. Just as Batman recovers from a difficult battle by beating the living hell out of a 3rd rate villain like the Riddler (or so I speculate), I gorged myself with a bounty of delicious vegan entrées. I chowed through my meal in a matter of minutes, and then sat back on my couch, stuffed and happy.

Day 3
9:00 am – Cup of coffee (no milk, no sugar) – sensing a pattern yet?
10:15 am – an apple (sigh)
12:00 pm – Arby’s side garden salad w/ raspberry vinaigrette dressing and a cup of coffee (you get the drill)
12:35 pm – an apple (double sigh)
7:00 pm – an order of “colorful vegetable Lo Mein” (Sautéed with soy protein, bean sprouts, carrots, napa cabbage, wood ear mushrooms and shiitake mushrooms), an order of “general Tso’s surprise” (chunks of soy protein in hot kong-pao sauce, garnishedwith steamed broccoli and carrots), and to celebrate my victory over my vanquished enemies, a 22oz bottle of Rogue Brewery’s “Santa’s Private Reserve” (Rogue brewery is indeed vegan friendly)
10:45 pm – glass of scotch (Johnnie Walker black label – again, vegan friendly)

Side Note:
At the start of this competition, I promised myself that when all was said and done, I would come out of this not having learned a damn thing. I don’t want to “walk a mile” in someone’s shoe, nor am I particularly interested in the vegan lifestyle. Hey, if it works for you, more power to you. Myself, I’m a carnivore, and I’m happy with that. After three days however, I can’t help but be impressed with the dedication required to living la vida vegan on a full time basis. Having to research whether or not a restaurant has a vegan option, double checking all ingredients before consuming, hearing the groans from the people in line behind you as the cashier at Panera checks with her manager to see whether or not the side baguette contains egg (it does) – these are all hassles that most people can’t be bothered with in our “I want it now” society. I’m not going to claim that I fully understand vegan-ism, but I will say that I appreciate the dedication to living the lifestyle – and I will no longer groan when the person in line ahead of me checks on the vegan status of their meal.

There, I’ve learned something. Are you happy now, because I feel dirty…

~Saps